This is what I’m working on now. Selina’s yaya went on a two-week holiday for the Christmas break. So that meant Cess and me would take turns in watching over the baby full time.

Last Friday, I volunteered to take Selina to the mall.

CESS: “ Why don’t you take our cook to accompany you.”

FLIM: “ Nah I want to spend some quality time with the baby. Take her around. Look at some books and toys, a ride or two and then some refreshments. The works.”

CESS: “ I’M NOT TOO SURE THAT YOU CAN HANDLE IT.”

FLIM: “ I CAN. I USE TO TAKE HER TO Jollibee in the mornings so this won’t be any diff.”

So we dropped off Cess in her office and right off, Selina did her thing!

SELINA: “ WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
WHERE’S MOMMY GOING, WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!”

FLIM: “ Ohh there, there I’ll take you shopping and we’ll buy toys and we’ll have fun! “

SELINA: “ WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! OPEN DOOR! OPEN THE DOOR! “

I told the driver to hit the pedal to the metal! And we were off! But before going to Glorietta I dropped by the supplier who ‘s contracted to sell me the latest editing machine.

By then SELINA was at full throttle!

SELINA: “ mOOOMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! WHERE’S MOMMMMEEEE! “

FLIM: “ Shush, keep quiet! I just have to get some last minute check up on daddee’s new editing equipment then were’ off.”

SELINA: “ NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! DON’T! LIKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!”

Everyone in the building was looking at me. We went inside the elevator where she screamed her head off! Acoustics in enclosed spaces are really tricky! Three other occupants inside had to hold their hands to their ears. I was too deaf by then to even notice any difference.

I went to the office and there was my tech supervisor. He was giving the specs and the best possible set up to maximize my latest acquisition.

TECH SUPE: “ So you need an extra power generator because this machine is going to suck up all the electronic supply in your house my advice…


SELINA: ‘AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!! MOMMME!!!!!! I WANT MOMMMEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

FLIM: “ Don’t mind her, she just got out of prison and is experiencing separation anxieties.”

Tech supe goes on talking but Selina ‘s vocal prowess found an extra hidden energy reserve and it went from decibel levels to supersonic sub frequencies!

TECHSUPE: “ ……………………..Instant……………………then………………separate………….
………………………So I …………….not.”

FLIM: “ Uhm can we just talk on the phone. I’m not really getting any of this!”

While holding her as she gyrated and whipped up a tantrum of a cosmological magnitude.

So we we went off to glorietta. And when we climbed the escalator she suddenly smiled and the cries abated.

SELINA: “ Escalator, WHOPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

I was totally exasperated and I thought that the worst was over that once we were inside she would see so many distractions that she wont even notice her mother missing.

That illusion was suddenly shattered thirty minutes later when she threw a fit over at the POWER ZONE.

FLIM: “ I thought you wanted to ride the horsie! “

SELINA: “ Jet plane! “

FLIM: “ Ok! OK! “

So we strapped ourselves inside the sega powered simulator and we were off and running!

Selina kept pressing the change view button so I amaze even myself when I was able to hit all the targets!

BOY SPECTATOR: “ Hey youre good! Even when she’s changing your view button.”

FLIM: “ Try raising a kid like this and I can do anything! “

She then brought me to the skateboard simulator and we rode that too! She became dizzy and kinda liked walked funny so we took a breather beside the fountain. I then went to the Potatoes corner to get her some barbeque flavored French fries.

While on line, she ran off and I had to chase her! This happened nine times, try doing that while lining up for some fries.

When our turn was near I decided to just wrestle her and pin her under my arms as I wait for my turn. But like the fearless and energetic combatant that she is, she wriggled out of my headlock and climbed my shoulders. It was like trying to catch a slippery fish.

VENDOR: “ what would you like sir.”

FLIM: “ 2 barbeques please and make it quick, I might drop the kid.”

VENDOR: “ here you are.”

FLIM: “ Can you fish out the money on my right side pocket? Both of my hands are full at the moment! “

SELINA: “ I WANT TO GO TO FOUNTAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

VENDOR: “Ohm what a loud voice for a child. Are all children like that?”

FLIM: “ My advise to you, is NEVER TO BEAR CHILDREN! ITS LUNACY! Keep the change! “

Feeding her was a breeze; it’s the catching up with her as she runs like a gazelle thru the crowed ground floor of glorietta that’s the trick!

Two hours later after riding the escalator, forty times straight, which she was crazy for? I had to sit down and think about life.

This was just one day. And she’s now 3. I wonder what she will be like when she’s four, five or six. Would I have the stamina and the patience to weather the storm? Will I survive it? I should be an optimist; hell I wont even survive today.

Around six thirty, I had to call reinforcements.

FLIM: “ HELLO, CESS. SEND HELP NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!! “

My wife picked us up at around 7. And as I slumped inside the car, I dropped like a log.

CESS: “ Well how was it? “

FLIM: “ When the yaya gets back, give her a raise! “